Behavior Observations: When There Appears to be a Controlling Partner
Download as a PDF: Behavioral Observations.
Name:________________________________Date:__________
The following is a list of areas of concern to be aware of when speaking with and/or observing interactions of caretakers. Please check any that apply.
__House appears dark and closed in
__Has to have partner present
__Has no contact with family and/or friends
__Has no access to automobile or other transportation
__Has no access to telephone
__Has no way to contact anyone
__Cannot go out alone
Emotional
__Is expected to anticipate and meet all needs of partner
__Feels unintelligent and uneducated around partner
__Feels unable to be alone or live without partner
__Feels incapable of being a good parent
__Feels responsible for incidents and actions of partner
__Takes responsibility for all difficulties
__Fears that partner will harm children if she/he is not compliant
__Fears that partner will harm pets if she/he is not compliant
Verbal
__Is not allowed to talk/partner talks over her/him
__Partner speaks for her/him
__Accepts partner’s name calling without responding
__Is often told to “shut up” or “keep quiet”
__Is told by partner what to say and when
Financial
__Is not allowed any control of financial matters
__Is not allowed to know any financial information
__Is totally dependent on partner for money
Physical
__is verbally threatened that she/he will be hurt
__Is intimidated by non-verbal, physically aggressive behavior of partner
__Is physically abused by partner; i.e. hit, slapped, punched, etc.
__Is helpless to prevent partner from physically harming children
__Is helpless to prevent partner from physically harming pets
Sexual
__Is “on call” for partners needs and wishes regardless of own desires
__Is forced (raped) against his/her wishes
Legal
__Fears that partner will call Children’s Protective Services
__Fears that partner will file for custody of children
__Fears that partner will talk to police first and be believed
__Fears that partner will file a restraining order first
Other
__Confuses partner’s controlling behavior as signs of caring
__Puts other’s needs above own
__History of abusive relationships
__Has generational history of abuse or witnessing abuse
__Uses alcohol and/or other substances
__Low self-esteem/no sense of self
__Headaches, GI problems, physical injuries, frequent doctor visits
__Believes in stereotypical sex roles